I don't know why, but I feel like I'm losing control of everything. And it's not in the "I need to control everything" way.I literally just feel so exhausted.
Or spread thin.
But most of the time I'm happy.
Most of the time I go a whole day being content.
And then I just feel lost on other days.
I feel like I'm not giving enough of myself, but then I look at my life and see that there is nothing left of me to give. Or it seems.
I think that I've hit the ceiling.
On my emotions. On my relationship with God.
I keep pressing harder and harder against the ceiling but it doesn't come off. I just get spread and worn, thinner and thinner across it.
I know that something needs to change in my life.
I don't know what it is.
But I know it's going to come into my home of comfort and it's going to blow up. It's going to blow the ceiling right off.
And I know it's going to hurt like hell.
But I'm ready.