Evil Doesn't Win

Have you ever watched a movie where the bad guy gets away?

You spend an hour or two watching the villain harass the protagonist, fully knowing that they will get theirs in the end.

Then as the end approaches the very unsettling feeling of dread washes over you as suddenly you realize that they get away. The bad guy gets away. The murderer escapes. The villain lives another day to torment someone else.

You want to know why it’s so unsettling?

Because most of us are instilled with the belief that good always wins.

We have been trained since birth that bad guys never win, and good guys always have the last word.

Evil is always conquered.

There has to be a reason that we walk around every day knowing that good always wins.

There has to be a reason that even though I have been walking through the hardest season of my life, I still know deep down in my heart that this isn’t how it ends. That this isn’t where it ends because evil does not win. And I think that we were created with this belief.

God created us in His image, and God is a God of justice.

He is the ultimate “good guy.”

Think about it.

He sent His Son to die on a cross as the atonement for our sins. Do you know what that means?

If we believe in Him… everything we have ever done and everything we will ever do… every mistake we make…knowingly and unknowingly… is paid for. It’s wiped away. It’s forgotten. There is no more record. Because He keeps no record of wrongs.

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” John 3:16

So why do we believe that good always wins?

Because everything that God has ever done has been proof that it does.

Because even if we suffer, there is hope.

Because even if we die, there is eternal life.

Because even if we lose a battle, He has won the war.

Because God is good.

And Good always wins.

Not an End

I'll just start by saying these past two and a half years have been my favorite season of my life. I have grown and matured more than I could have ever imagined and I got to meet amazing people along the way. Then enters this thing called transition.

Not a fan.

Transition is just a fancy way of saying things are changing and you either get with it or you put it off but eventually have to give in anyways because it has to happen.

It's not something you can stop. A lot of the time it's not something you even see coming.

You can be living life, loving it and not wanting anything to change, and then here comes transition lurking around the corner ready to slap you upside your head, or rip the rug out from underneath you.

Sometimes, however, you know when it's coming.

Sometimes you get to see it all unfold in front of you and you get time to process.

I'm not sure if this is better or not.

Being jolted into something new is sometimes better because otherwise you probably wouldn't have chosen to do it. That's how I ended up here in the first place.

Seeing the moment of transition coming and not wanting it to happen and not being able to stop it is hard.

That's how this has been.

Two years ago someone bought the permit to the land The Station is currently located on. We've had two years to process the fact that when our lease is up at the end of this month we will be moving.

We just had our last camp on the property.

So on the last morning, I got up early and went into the lodge to pray and worship. I sat at the back and stared at all of the chairs that sat there waiting to be occupied for breakfast.

And I thought about all of the campers that have come through our doors. And then I began to thank God for all the campers who have come through our doors.

I started thanking him for my life being impacted by this small little camp with the biggest vision. I thanked him for the friends I have made and the family I have become a part of. I somehow in a matter of minutes turned my mindset from "this is the end" to "this is just the beginning."

And honestly, it's the truth.

Transitions don't necessarily mean it's an end. Sometimes things end, but for this it's just the property.

The dream hasn't died. The vision is still there. It's just the beginning of what God wants to do with The Station.

So as I sat, finally accepting this transition.

The only word I could think of was thankful.

Thankful for this place and what it means to me.

And thankful for the more to come.

Deja Vu

We all have those moments. Where we see something that we think we've already seen before.

We hear words that sound exactly like they did once before, when we heard them the first time.

I remember one time I had deja vu so bad, that I honesty believed that I had dreamt the situation before. No one could convince me that it hadn't happened at some point.

Today I took the time to put my stuff away in my new home.

I filled my dresser and made my bed while I listened to The Classic Crime on my record player.

Somehow everything found it's place. Everything seemed to fit perfectly into this tiny little space that was going to be my new home.

I looked over at my records stacked against my bed and it happened. Deja Vu. I sat there wondering where I had seen it all before and then I stopped.

It hadn't happened before. I knew that. I know that.

But for some reason, as I put my last book in it's place the deja vu gave me this weird feeling.

I stared down at my stack of records and this overwhelming feeling of peace came over me.

Almost as if I was finally where I was supposed to be.

I have found myself in this place where I am challenged. I am pushed further and further outside of my comfort zone everyday.

And you know what, I kind of love it.

I love the people. I love this place. I love the new adventures. And I love the future here.

The future that will consist of God pulling apart my life and putting it back together with only the important stuff.

The things that I've limited myself in, I will excel in.

The things I've told myself I've hated for so long will now be the things that intrigue me.

I sit here staring at my new home, with the amazing feeling that finally the things I've dreamed of before are coming into reality.

So maybe I haven't seen this all before and it actually was deja vu.

But I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am in the right place.

Giddy Anxious

Have you ever been so excited for something that you just get anxious about it? Like, you're totally happy, but this thing that is supposed to be happening means that you have to be patient.

You need to wait.

And the waiting is causing you anxiety.

Well. That's me right now.

I'm waiting to hear about a possible job. And after finally telling the one person I was scared to tell, the fear disappeared and all that was left was excitement.

I feel full support and I feel that the interview went well.

I have heard it from good authority that I pretty much have the job already.

But I'm waiting to hear it from the person who matters, the director, the person who would be hiring me.

I NEED to be patient. But all I can do is keep checking my email.

It reminds me of when I would go to camp, or really anywhere that I was excited to go to.

I can't really sleep. I'm anxious. I'm excited. I'm trying to be patient. But I just keep jumping every time someone mentions it.

I'm Giddy Anxious.

I know that there are certain situations in my past where I had the chance to be patient and I didn't wait on God.

I made a choice that I didn't necessarily want to make and here we are.

I need to wait on God and believe that he has the best for me.

If it's not this than it will be something else.

I'm waiting.

Anxiously Giddy.

Lord,

I pray that you will give my heart peace. Peace and Patience God. I pray that no matter what I will keep my head high and keep working hard. I will stay confident like I have been the past couple of days. I pray that I will continue striving to be better. Lord I really do want this, more than anything. I was up there for two days and I had already started to feel closer to you because the distractions fell away. I will try my best to understand if you say no that it means there is something better. But Lord I pray there isn't. ha. I want to strive to know you more God, I want to seek your face. I love you Lord.

Amen.